Tuesday, October 1, 2013
7-10-13 RMB Exploring Love
7-10-13 RMB Exploring Love
Dear Rita Mae Brown,
In your early writings, in books such as Plain Brown Wrapper, you bring up various pictures of society, recommendations of sorts. In Bingo, the main character, Nickie discusses society’s responsibility to all, to create a more honest, transparent atmosphere. It is interesting how Jackson, her lover, had another angle to add to the prism; that of one man loving two women and how he was as at odd with society’s picture of a family, as a gay person might be. In Alma Mater, the main characters participate in a love triangle with a happy ever after, or rather, as happy ever after as possible, ending.
“Some animals are monogamous. Some are not. They accept their fundamental natures. When it comes to humans, the kindest way to approach this is to understand that monogamy is contrary to nature but necessary for the greater social good.” ~Rita Mae Brown
You have obviously put some thought into how love fits in society and voiced a variety of possibilities. It is important for authors to show us ourselves, how we are and how we could be. You are brave to tackle this from so many perspectives. You are brave to have lived a life exploring possibilities, loving deeply and facing the outcome, regardless of the consequences.
Who we love, how we love and why we love is such a fluid merger, that it is impossible to tell where one ends and another begins.
At the root of the matter, before we truly understand two lovers, or three, or love of thy neighbor, or a society accepting of love in its many shades, so much must transpire. First, to explore love, affection, compassion, the benefits, the life it lives. “God is love” Reverend Millie Landis preached weekly.
I began to see what she meant. I began to see strength in the energy that flows when love is present. Many would scoff at the thought that this entity lives, present and powerful. Yet, everyone has felt a draw towards someone or something they love. It works like a magnet on our souls. Sometimes we work with it and experience a sense of being in sync with ourselves, our mission. Sometimes we fight it, or become confused and at a loss to how to work with it…square pegs in round holes.
It has an intelligence, one that identifies when something will work and when it won’t. One day we may feel we have found the perfect mate and the next day our world lay in ruins as the relationship crumbles. We are not yet as fluid as love, as life. We like our square pegs to fit perfectly, snug and warm. We find a perfect moment and attempt to make it last a lifetime. We insist on what “I want” and “I need”, rather than seek “what’s next?”
If we understood love, or even affection, perhaps compassion, the qualities, the benefits, to ourselves and others, would we be more accepting; willing to find common ground? Will humankind ever appreciate our differences? Imagine all we could learn from one another, if we did.
“We aren’t going to get anywhere as individuals or as a nation
if we don’t negotiate our differences with trust.” ~Rita Mae Brown