7-25-13 RMB Bewildered
Dear Rita Mae Brown,
The sister that lives with me has been complaining of feeling ill for a few days, mostly of a fever. It didn’t seem high to me and medication brings it back down when it rises. Perhaps I’m tarnished by all those around me that insist they are in dire need when that is not the case at all…picture Fred Sanford on the show “Sanford and Son” feigning a heart attack.
Tarnished or insensitive or too buried within my cave, whatever I am, I gave the sister little attention over the matter, until tonight. Tonight I could see for myself she was clearly not well. I drove her to the ER. I didn’t even wait for her. She has done this drill before, I figured she would call when they diagnosed her and prescribed medication. I was prepared to get the call at any time of the night to go pick her up.
The call came, but it was not to pick her up. They admitted her. Kidney failure, serious business. They say they caught it in time.
Wow, why didn’t I see that coming? Sometimes my Spidey sense fails me…or maybe it is I that lacked awareness to catch the message or the compassion to feel it.
Often it is hard to “see” those nearest. When reading tarot cards for strangers I get a variety of images and messages, but when working with someone close, it’s more of a stretch. The analytical mind sticks its nose in, filtering the message, justifying the unknown with the known, putting a shade on scenarios so that they make sense with what I know of the individual.
It’s hard, but sometimes I have to force myself to remember that there is a whole lot in our universe that makes no sense at all.
Bewilderedly,
Loraine
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